marriage advice for a bride.

Words of wisdom for brides old and new.

If you follow me on Instagram, you may know that I spent time this past weekend with one of my best friends who is getting married next month. At her bridal shower on Saturday, we went around as Emily was opening each of our gifts and gave a piece of marriage advice (or told a fond story of how we met her for those who weren’t married). Our friend group does this every ‘shower’ we give – whether it’s been bridal showers or baby showers and it’s such a wonderful and simple way to bless the bride or mom-to-be and shower them with love and wisdom.

It’s funny, no matter how many showers I go to given by my friends, I always forget that this occurs and I’m never fully ready to give my advice when the time comes. This past weekend at Emily’s bridal shower was no exception and I’ve found myself having several different conversations in my head about what I could’ve said instead of what I did or how I could have expanded upon what I did say. Between that and wanting to remember some of the advice I heard aloud from other wise women in the room, I thought I’d take a moment to write some of it here in hopes that maybe it will bless some of you current and future brides!

• Remember that you’re on the same team. Don’t keep track of wrongdoings, fights or the little things. Let things go and remember that you’re in it together.
• There will be times when you let each other down. That’s when, more than ever, you need to lean in and love hard – even if you don’t want to.
• There will be days when you wake up and you don’t feel ‘in love’ with him. But love is an action. Love him hard regardless and that ‘in love’ feeling will come back.
• Don’t go to bed mad.
• Despite the popular adage, you don’t always have to be right – and you won’t be. Let go of the small things and learn to compromise because you’re only one part of a whole.
• Make God the foundation of your marriage. Go to Him with everything – the joyful and the negative. With Him at the center you will always make it through.
• Make time for each other. As you get older it will be harder and harder to spend time with just the two of you (especially with kids). Make one-on-one time a priority because it’s so important.
• Fight with love. No matter how hard you try, there will always be fights – big and small – and that’s ok. Do your best to let go of the small things, try to see things from his point of view and always remember that you’re on the same side.
• The first year is NOT always the easiest. And if it’s not, it doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with you. Marriage is a union of two imperfect people and sometimes that means things aren’t picture perfect.
• Never stop dating each other – even if, for a season, dating means simply cooking dinner together after the kids go to bed.
• Go on adventures together. Near and far. Even if it takes saving and scrimping your pennies, because discovering new places is so much fun and brings you together in ways only travel can.

If you have any advice of your own I would LOVE for you to write it in a comment below! You never know when someone needs to hear a wise word or bit of encouragement.